Spelling and Grammar - how hard is it to get it right?!!

R2
This is written in that curious dialect called ebayese, which also sometimes appears on fora such as this. I am in the process of designing an Ebayese - English dictionary, but here are a few examples:

Definatly - definitely
Decrative - decorative
Replys - replies
1930s - 1960s
Bakerlight - bakelite
Loose - lose
Lose - loose
It's - its
Its - it's
Vintage - pre 2000
I cannot try it as no battery/plug/cable etc - I did try it and it doesn't work
Ect - etc

Grammatical rules - everything in either upper or lower case, no punctuation except apostrophes; these to be inserted in every word ending in 's'

Ooh - I'm so glad you're compiling a dictionary. Don't forget:
lady's high healed shoe's
a bargin
curtins
you will recieve it quick if you Paypal - its free (add on 5%)
Aah - there are so many......

I did forget!
'Twill be a labour not unlike cleansing the Augean stables.......

Poor spelling I can understand, after all most of the inhabitants of the ex-colonies have trouble with the correct version! (Mrs M, Puppy Raiser, Lexie that's a joke - honest!)

My real issue is with the half truths that are commonplace in ebay descriptions. "I am not an expert" "I haven't tried this" "I don't know how this works" "I haven't put a battery in" etc etc

In other words its a load of cr*p and I'm trying to dump it on an unsuspecting mug who doesn't understand the coded language.

I really want to sell (ie get rid of) a couple of Quad electrostatic speakers. Should I say, "bought at auction by an idiot who didn't understand why everyone else didn't bid, stored in the shed because the wife wouldn't allow them in the house and responsible for blowing up a expensive amplifier because they need a special one that takes the load. Also, one speaker has a transformer problem that my radio repairer refuses to fix because it demands a specialist tool he hasn't got."

No, I shall simply say:

"I kno nuthin about these, i bort them at a house sale they have "QUAD" on them & looke like radiaters"

Everybody will think I am an ignorant oaf and they have a bargain!

Paul

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My real issue is with the half truths that are commonplace in ebay descriptions. "I am not an expert" "I haven't tried this" "I don't know how this works" "I haven't put a battery in" etc etc

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Thank you Paul! I concur with you.

Yeah, me too!

The kits I buy can be risky sometimes, especially when people might be pretending they don't know much about them.

I have bought one from an antique dealer who actually used the word 'complete' when it wasn't. They were genuine though, and refunded the money when I brought it to their notice.

There are many however, who say "I haven't checked this but it seems to be all there". If they are unfamiliar with the subject, why do they say it 'seems' to be all there. If they do know the subject, why haven't they checked it?

If they can't be specific then I don't want to know. They can keep their rubbish.

GG

Hmmm - I wonder what 'special tool' is required to work on a Quad ESL transformer?
I think that ebay buyers really have to ask lots of questions and 'read between the lines' in the answers - you get a sort of a 'sixth sense'. Beware of those with dozens of antiques found in various aged relatives' attics and sheds, or that they have owned since they were one, despite the fact that their user name is something like acornantiques.
I must admit I have never been diddled on ebay, but Sceptic is my middle name, as they say.

Paul
Where in the world are you, and what precisely is wrong with your ESLs?

Spelling and grammar
Dyslexics and those for whom English is not their first language excepted from these comments.

• 
  Spell checkers are one of the reasons for this -they gladly insert the wrong word. I have just seen an ebay item - Vidor radio, with some wording from a period advert that said 'Make hay with video while the sun shines'
  
• People do not attempt to read what they have written
  
• If you speak the language you can probably write it - if every sentence you utter contains a 'basically' and a few 'like's and ends in 'know what ah mean' then you will probably write like that.

<rant>
Reliance on the written word as a means of communication is increasing, literacy is not; in England, schools did not teach English for about 25 years
</rant>


PS - I am waiting for a car to be advertised on ebay with 'Don't know if it goes as I cannot find key'

I am certain you will find it!!!

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PS - I am waiting for a car to be advertised on ebay with 'Don't know if it goes as I cannot find key'

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A word that is used often where I live is 'chimley"! I go crazy when I hear it. How could you possibly hear an L in chimney??

Here are a few more entries for your dictionary:

bidded=bid
l@@k=look
snip=snipe
snipped=sniped
chat bored=chat board

I really don't get too out of sorts in the forum over spelling errors. I know we are often in a hurry or distracted otherwise while typing.
Many times I post and go back later to see a glaring error. Oh well, the pay is not great either! Lol!

My neighbor, when I was small, called a sink a zink! I thought it was made of some special materal! ...BTW, he was a well educated, college graduate!

America is loaded with hundreds of colloquial expressions and words. Afterall, although we speak English, the people that settled our country spoke many languages , leaving traces of their languages attached to many words!

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I really don't get too out of sorts in the forum over spelling errors. I know we are often in a hurry or distracted otherwise while typing

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Then there are those of us from 3rd world countries that spell different to most.

• Neighbour
• Colour
• Tomatoe.

Then there's us ole *chatties* from Live Chats, who use all the quaint little misspellings in forums to drive Grammar-Anals (like R2 ) insane.

• prolly - probably
• s'pose - suppose

Then there is just good ole Lexie-ism's. Too numerous to mention.

I promise I can write and spell correctly when the need arises. I can even punctuate to satisfy R2.

Mrs M - your dislike of "Chimley" is understandable. We have one here that is s'posed to be "Cordial" (mixer drink), but often said as "Corgigal" .

My girlfriend religiously says "Hoat Canger" instead of "Coat Hanger".

But then, she and I were the creator's of "Now thats the pot calling the pot a pot". Well....we were drunk at the time and "The Pot calling the Kettle Black" just didnt work for us.

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Then there are those of us from 3rd world countries that spell different to most.

Neighbour
Colour
Tomatoe.

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Tomatoe? What country is that from, Lexie?
S'pose is fine - it is not a misspelling, just an approximation of what is said, like 'twas and 't'ain't.
'Hoat Canger' is a Spoonerism, like 'Lemon Turd Cart'
We have 'chimleys' here as well - even sometimes 'chimbleys'!
BTW, plurals do not have apostrophes in them [creator's] unless you are an English market stallholder

I'll bet we could all get together and write a book on the subject! LOL!

In the US there is such a diversity of backgrounds that every part of the country is different! On simple examples is sack, bag, poke, all of which carry groceries home!

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Originally posted by Mrs.M:
In the US there is such a diversity of backgrounds …

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Pretty much applies to most countries – especially true of Europe and has been going on a LOT longer in Europe. U.S. is relatively young. Of course, some of the U.S. diversity definitely was in the background, or put under-ground.

Rick,I meant that people settled the US from all over Europe, Africa,and Asia. Thus, in Kentucky, for instance there is a strong French influence. Where I live there is a strong Swiss and German influence, etc. In contrast, I lived and worked in many countries and found the people to be from their local culture for hundreds of generations, as a whole.

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Originally posted by Mrs.M:
In contrast, I lived and worked in many countries and found the people to be from their local culture for hundreds of generations, as a whole.

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”Hundreds” being more than one. Sounds like at least 300 generations. At 20 years a generation, that’s a minimum of 6,000 years. Surely there must have been some “diversity of backgrounds” introduced during that time. If nothing else, there must have been the occasional invasion.

Ok, ok, Rick..a slight overstatement.

...but where my family came from, we allowed no invasions and wore chasity belts!

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Originally posted by Mrs.M:
Ok, ok, Rick..a slight overstatement.

...but where my family came from, we allowed no invasions and wore chasity belts!

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Originally posted by Mrs.M:
...but where my family came from, we allowed no invasions and wore chasity belts!

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If my assumption of Germany is correct, I could have a grand time exploring this topic. But, if I remember correctly, the Germans kicked some major Romans' asses. But, again, that's assuming it’s Germany, and since my assuming powers have been flawed today, I best not press any residual luck I may possess.

Back to my original thread...

Sumfink and nuffink are splendid versions of something and nothing, particularly evident in South East London. Even the G/F's mother (who is so posh she won't shop [never has] in ASDA which is owned by Walmart!) says it. Luckily her daughter was raised 'proper-like'!

R2

Love it, R2!

Here it's everone instead of everyone...
and the ambalance comes when you call 911.

And..water flows in a crick, not creek.

I shall have to remember to say... Up sh*t crick without a paddle from now on

I have a really old leather bound grammar book. It gives the correct second person and second person plural personal pronouns as 'thou' and 'ye.'

Of course, everyone knows that they're actually 'you' and 'y'all/you all.'

We arent big on "y'all". But, you did leave out "youse" (ewes).

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Originally posted by region2:
Back to my original thread...

_Sumfink_ and _nuffink_ are splendid versions of _something_ and _nothing_, particularly evident in South East London. Even the G/F's mother (who is so posh she won't shop [never has] in ASDA which is owned by Walmart!) says it. Luckily her daughter was raised 'proper-like'!

R2

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Surely the most sensible reason for not shopping at Asda is that their product is c**p and the selection/variety non-existent!

Yours from a couple who appreciate decent food. FS

Don't know about sumfink & nuffink, but I like getting summat for nowt!

GG

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We arent big on "y'all". But, you did leave out "youse" (ewes).

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Think I remember that from a movie about an attorney from the "Bronx" that defends his relation in the South. The judge hated his slang! The name was "My Cousin Vinny".

M said:

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Think I remember that from a movie about an attorney from the "Bronx" that defends his relation in the South. The judge hated his slang! The name was "My Cousin Vinny".

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Wow!!

Oh yes!!!
Chimley & chimbley, makes me cringe.
How about "Skellington" or "DigiKal watches"??
My pet hate is "orientated", at least Americans get this one right with "oriented". It's becoming so common in the UK that it's creeping into print and TV.
I thought language was supposed to Evolve, not DEvolve!

Going to lie down and calm myself now... rant over!

Pete