My 2 cents.
I'm going to try and walk the middle of the road on this one.
As a seller, I try to leave feedback when paid if the buyer has been around for a while, has good feedback, and knows how the game is played. For someone with little or no feedback, or even if I only get that 'funny feeling', no, I wait to make sure they are happy first. (I only sell good stuff
) As a buyer, I don't care. When I get the item, if I like it and am happy, I leave feedback. There is no reason to fear a negative if they got paid and I'm happy. If I haven't gotten any from them yet, I send a very short email. 'Item ####### recieved, feedback left, Thank you.'
Feedback *IS* more important to a seller. If I hold an item till it's paid for, why should it matter to me what a buyers feedback is? (Unless it's really really bad or hidden then I'll delete a bid and block). 97% for a seller isn't very good IMO. I don't need 100%, but try to stick with those above 99. If their feedback is in the thousands, it needs to be higher than that.
One of my last sales, a note was sent. 'Item shipped... yadda yadda... will leave feedback once recieved and know you are happy. 3 weeks later, no word. I decided he must be happy. Left feedback (no email) and feedback was returned the following day. Another time received an email. 'item received, I AM happy' (but no feedback). IMO both were silly.